Hilarious SNL parody of Twilight starring Taylor Swift - enjoy!

*Starred* Booklist review for Alan DeNiro's TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS

This is an amazing - and thoughtful - review:

TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS by Alan DeNiro:

For 16-year-old Macy, the whole world has gone crazy, quite literally. Barbarians from antiquity have invaded America, while bizarre plagues and impossibly shifting landscapes ravage her Minnesota homeland. Together with her parents, sister, brother, and a possibly evil dog, Macy sets out down the Mississippi on an adventure that takes her into the smoldering ruins of St. Louis, aboard a wooden submarine that’s bigger on the inside than outside, and finally into the stone-skyscraper capital of Nueva Roma. All the while she dodges oil-men turned slavers, plague-instigating wasps, an albino bounty hunter, and, perhaps most dangerous of all, her scheming younger brother. DeNiro (who flaunted a knack for offhand SF oddness in Skinny Dipping in the Lake of the Dead, 2006) makes sure never to do anything as dull as explaining what the heck is going on—we simply accept that the world has become a surreal, historical landscape come to life and move on. He drops in so many tantalizingly inspired touches—the new (old?) empire considers Post-it notes a precious natural resource—that leaving his inside-out America at the end is almost painful. There aren’t many writers who take weirdness as seriously as DeNiro does, and fewer still who can extract so much grounded emotion, gut-dropping humor, and rousing adventure from it. A dizzying display of often brilliant, always strange, and definitely unique storytelling. — Ian Chipman

Seriously, if you haven't preordered this book yet, well...why the hell not?

We have a Bloom County winner!!!

Okay, my bad! I kept forgetting to actually pick a winner for my Bloom County contest! But after reading and re-reading and laughing my head off a LOT, we finally do have a winner!

Paul Neuhardt, your FTC disclaimer was my favorite, and will live on in infamy on The Swivet and hopefully help keep the FTC off my ass. Therefore, YOU are the winner of a brand-new copy of Bloom County: The Complete Collection, Volume One: 1980-1982, courtesy of Diamond Book Distributors and IDW.

And here's Paul's disclaimer:

DISCLAIMER: Be it known by all here reading that the following may or may not be the case in any given book review I post:

1. If I talk about a book, I might have gotten it for free from someone with a vested interest in the success of that book. On the other hand, I might have found it abandoned in the seat pocket in front of me during my last plane trip. I’ll try to let you know on a case by case basis.

2. If that aforementioned someone who gave me the book is deluded enough to think that my blog constitutes anything even remotely resembling “a force” in publishing, then there is the serious chance that my free book was worth every penny I paid for it and I’m unlikely to talk about it anyway. Just saying...

3. Publishers and authors, I will be happy to shill for you, but you better pony up cash. Lots of cash. All the free stuff I get is reviewed with what turns out to be my honest opinion, meaning if I think it’s crap, I’ll call it crap. Oh yeah, if you do pay me for the review, I’m going to mention that factoid by saying something like, “I read this fabulous book the other day, which I would never have known about if the publisher hadn’t sent me on an all-expenses paid holiday to a secluded tropical island, allowing me to read my complimentary copy on the beach in peace.”

4. Readers, until you see me tooling around in a BMW that is unexplainable by the income from my day job (and all BMW's meet this condition) you will know that I’m telling you what I think about the book, no matter how the damn thing ended up in my grubby mitts. (See Item 3 above for clarification on why this is so.)

5. FTC-type people, if this isn’t a good enough disclaimer for you, then you need to get a life. The IRS is happy with me, and they are notorious for being the grumpiest agency in our government that isn’t in the spy business. Who are you to think you know better than the IRS?

6. I could have said all this in far fewer words, but dealing with the federal government is like dealing with my seventh-grade English teacher: High word count rules, and bullshitting is allowed. There, I threw you FTC guys another bone and made this really long so it looks all official. Sorry about the IRS remark, fellas. That one was cold, I admit.

Congratulations, Paul, and thanks for playing!

Live-chat with author Eoin Colfer today at 3:30 PM EST!

Head on over to Suvudu today at 3:30 EST to live-chat with Eoin Colfer, author of the bestselling Artemis Fowl series, Airman (soon to be a movie!) and the controversial And Another Thing.

(And while you're there, don't forget to enter Suvudu's And Another Thing Sweepstakes!)

Contest! Win a copy of BOOKLIFE: Strategies and Survival Tips for the 21st Century Writer

Last week I told you all about Jeff VanderMeer's extraordinary new book for writers, Booklife: Strategies and Survival Tips for the 21st Century Writer

This week, you can enter a contest to win one of five copies that Tachyon Publications have graciously offered up as prizes.

What do you have to do to win? Easy! Leave a comment below and share ONE GREAT IDEA for self-promoting a book, something you've either done yourself or have seen another author do successfully.

Teh Rulez:

• One entry per person
• Leave your great book self-promotion idea in the comments field of this post
• U.S. Residents only
• Contest closes Tuesday, November 4th at 5:00 PM EST. Or EDT. Or whatever the hell time 5:00 is in NYC next Tuesday.

Good luck!

"What do you think I voted for at Omaha Beach?"

Meet Philip Spooner, WWII vet, war hero, lifelong Republican, husband, father, straight white man and defender of gay marriage. I dare you not to cry.

Booklife: Strategies and Survival Tips for the 21st Century Writer - A different kind of guide for writers

There are a slew of writers' guides out there, every one of them chock full of well-meaning advice: How to write better, how to get published, how to self-promote. But not one of them talks about how to live a whole booklife, that is, a life that allows a writer to balance writing and the creative process with the very real modern necessities of self-promotion, personal branding and planning long-term career goals. (Oh, and somewhere in there? You're gonna want to eat, sleep, breathe and poop.)

Jeff VanderMeer's brand new book Booklife: Strategies and Survival Tips for the 21st Century Writer addresses all of these things. (Well, okay, maybe not the pooping part.)

Some of what Booklife talks about:

• Using new media: blogs, Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, YouTube, podcasts, and IM
• Effectively networking in the modern era (why it’s not all about you)
• Understanding the lifecycle of a book and your role in the publication process
• Finding balance between your public and private lives and personas
• Creating a brand and identity tied to your strengths and your writing
• Working with your publisher: editors, publicists, marketing, and sales
• Taking the long view: establishing short- and long-term professional goals
• Getting through rejection and understanding the importance of persistence
• Enjoying and enhancing your creative process

Booklife comes with a great accompanying website, Booklife Now, that will provide fresh content every week from publishing professionals and published writers, as well as chats with some of the many contributors to Booklife. (Hey, I even have a couple of short chapters in the book, and will be answering questions online at Booklife Now on November 4th!)

If you're a writer and you're at all serious about it as a profession, I recommend that you go get yourself a copy of Booklife NOW!

Here's a brief excerpt from the book:

From Booklife: Strategies and Survival Tips for the 21st Century Writer:

Many different factors determine your public brand in terms of a Booklife. Every publisher, every book cover, every online forum, every interview request you accept helps define you as a writer. Reviewers, critics, publicists, even your agent will define you as a writer too. However, you can have an important role in shaping your destiny by what labels you accept through your actions and what labels you reject through your actions. If you’re interested in being proactive in this area, a quick way to evaluate your current situation is to ask yourself a series of questions, the answers to which require research on the Internet. The content you produce plays a role in labeling, but not as large a role as you might think.

>>How do my readers perceive me and my work?

A simple Google search should answer this question, especially if you take the time to thoroughly read all entries across the web, categorize each mention as about you or about your work, make a determination as to the influence each forum, blog, LiveJournal, website, or other online entity exerts, and then build a composite picture of both yourself and your work from that research. Other questions you might ask in this context include:

--What do the covers or other design aspects of my creative projects convey to readers?

--How does the reputation or slant of my publisher (or other gatekeeper) affect how I am perceived?

--Which authors am I most often compared to — by reviewers, consumers, and my own publisher? (Do these authors correspond to my own desired parallels?)

>>What does my blog/website tell people about my work?

Usually, blog subject patterns are very revealing. No matter how you might want to be a different kind of writer, your blog eventually tells you who you really are by revealing what interests you and moves you to write. Many times I have seen bloggers try to re-imagine themselves by either archiving or deleting an old blog and starting a new one, with a fresh emphasis. Most of the time, the new blog starts looking like the old blog within five or six months, in terms of the type of content presented there. If this is the case, you are fighting against your core nature and should practice acceptance. You’ll be much happier.

>>What websites and blogs have I added to my favorites in my web browser, and does reading them support my efforts at branding?

You’re shaped in part by the content you digest. If you aspire to be a mystery writer but the geek/reader part of you has decided to visit mostly fantasy or pop culture sites, you are absorbing content that isn’t directly supporting your writing goals. While there’s nothing wrong with diversity or using part of your day to play, just be aware that in doing so you are making a choice. Indeed, you may be telling yourself you don’t want to write mysteries after all.

>>What does the online trail of my doppelgänger look like?

Never underestimate the power of mimicry. If you have a writer you admire who you feel a kinship with--their writing is similar to yours in some way and their career has the trajectory you want for your own--use the Advanced Search options at google.com to map out their online presence on both blogs and websites. You will find out where the writer you want to emulate has and hasn’t been reviewed and interviewed, where they’ve been welcomed and where shut out.

You can then determine at least two things by implication: a general outline of that writer’s tactical decisions (roughly, what they said yes to or had a chance to say yes to) and the perception of that writer and his or her work on the Internet. Comparing that perception to the perception of your own persona and work helps to define the gap between where you are and where you want to be. (It also performs the useful service of uncovering possible opportunities and contacts.)

Booklife launched this week; Jeff's new novel Finch pubs on November 3rd. Starting THE VERY NEXT DAY, Jeff embarks on what can only be called the Book Tour of Insanity: 27 events in 36 days. Check out the tour schedule and head on out to meet him at a bookstore near you!

Guest blogger agent Rachelle Gardner talks about Christian publishing and the CBA marketplace.

I get a lot of queries from writers of Christian fiction and non-fiction, which is something I don't represent. Often, if I think the query has merit, I recommend that the writer try to query my colleague Rachelle Gardner, an agent pal of mine who specializes in Christian publishing and the CBA marketplace. I've been slammed a few times by writers whose Christian fiction I've rejected because of their mistaken assumption that I'm making a judgment about the writer's faith. I'm not, actually. But I am making a judgment about my own ability to intelligently represent a specialized category in a marketplace with which I have only a passing familiarity. The fact is that the CBA market is a vast one, with its own collection of publishers, editors, sales reps, jobbers and bookstore chains. And as such, it is a category that requires a special kind of expertise. Expertise that Rachelle Gardner has in spades, by the way, and that she graciously agreed to share here when I asked her if she'd write a little bit about Christian publishing for the readers of The Swivet.

The Scoop on Christian Publishing

by Rachelle Gardner, Literary Agent

WordServe Literary

If you're a Christian and you're writing a book that overtly includes your faith, whether it's fiction or non-fiction, consider that you may need to be looking for a CBA agent and a CBA publisher.

What's CBA?

CBA means "Christian Booksellers Association" but refers to the entire Christian publishing industry including publishers, authors, agents, and bookstores. It's a niche within the larger realm of publishing, and it developed over the last forty years to serve those who are looking for books that deal openly with Christianity.

The Christian publishing industry began with companies who published Bibles; then came the need for books to help people understand the Bible. The rest grew out of Christians' desire to read and write books that deal openly with all aspects of their faith.

Now there are a whole group of publishers who specifically serve the Christian market. Some of the largest and oldest are Thomas Nelson, Tyndale House, Guideposts, and Baker Books.

Most of the major secular publishers have recognized the potential in serving this market, so most of them have a Christian imprint:

→ Zondervan is an imprint of HarperCollins

→ Howard Books is an imprint of Simon & Schuster

→ Waterbrook/Multnomah is an imprint of Random House

→ FaithWords is an imprint of Hatchette Book Group

Christian bookstores serve this market as well: Lifeway, Mardel, and Family Christian Stores among others. Over the last ten years, regular (secular) bookstores have recognized how lucrative this market can be, so Barnes & Noble and Borders now have nice-sized sections devoted to Christian books.

Christian publishing also has its own writers conferences, as well as an annual convention (ICRS) that's similar to BEA only devoted to this specific market. And since the market is so specialized, there is a whole group of agents who have expertise in this market and serve Christian authors. Here is a good list of agents who work with the CBA.

Now, this is not to say that there's no overlap. Occasionally a secular imprint of a major New York house will publish a Christian book. And several CBA agents also represent books to non-CBA houses.

But if you're trying to sell a book with overtly Christian themes, be aware that you're probably not going to have much success querying general market agents. If they don't have experience selling into the CBA houses, they're not going to do a good job with your book. If they say "no" to representing your book, it's not necessarily because they're not a Christian (many are, as a matter of fact), it's because that's not the business they're in.

Almost all agents specialize in a particular type of book they represent. Some represent mostly romance. Some specialize in mystery, thriller and suspense. Some agents specialize in healthcare and self-help titles. Specialization allows agents to become experts in their genre or category, staying on top of trends and requirements. So, CBA agents specialize in Christian books by Christian authors.

The agents in New York spend years developing relationships with the editors at the New York publishing houses. Similarly, Christian agents spend years developing relationships with the editors at the Christian houses. So if you're trying to sell a book that overtly includes your Christianity, you're going to want to learn about CBA and get with an agent who can sell into CBA houses.

Want to learn more?

Here are some CBA agents who blog:

MacGregor Literary

Books & Such Literary

Steve Laube Literary

and then there's me.

Here are some posts from my blog that deal specifically with Christian publishing.

If you have further questions, please leave them in the comments. Thanks!

Rachelle Gardner has been an agent for two years, and has been in Christian publishing for six years. Prior to that she worked in general market publishing. Visit her blog here.

When overcaffeinated book bloggers are granted unchaperoned access to a video camera, THIS happens:

My bookish pals Russ Marshalek and Brett Sandusky, both book marketing veterans who normally behave themselves admirably in public (well, most of the time...Brett does have the whole bow-tie thing going on, something I've been meaning to speak to him about), have just launched a new publishing vlog (video blog). The name of their vlog is...er...um...ahem...Okay, the name of the vlog is Quit Being a Hooker, Hooker, which is billed as "The world's first publishing vlog (and the only publishing site with the word 'hooker' twice), brought to you by Russ Marshalek and Brett Sandusky. We're saving publishing one (ill conceived) vlog post at a time!"

This is how Russ and Brett ask for an author interview for their vlog. Try not to be drinking liquid when you watch this. (You've been warned.)

Publishers Weekly weighs in with nice review for Alan DeNiro's TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS

Which means y'all are gonna go out and preorder that bad boy right now, right? Let's make it easy for you, then: Amazon, Borders, IndieBound, B&N, and my personal favorite bookstore in the whole world, Mysterious Galaxy Books.

Total Oblivion, More or Less by Alan DeNiro.
Spectra, $15 paper (320p) ISBN 978-0-553-59254-2

As this peculiar but entertaining first novel begins, geography and cosmology have shifted. Natural laws work unpredictably. The U.S. government has disappeared and plundering bands of Goths and Scythians roam the Midwest. Sea serpents close the shipping lanes, and oil companies convert their tankers into slave ships that cruise the Mississippi. Clear-eyed, tough-minded teen Macy Palmer flees St. Paul with her family for the illusory safety of an island in the Gulf of Mexico. As they travel through a wavering postapocalyptic landscape, her relatives undergo upsetting personal metamorphoses. DeNiro has attracted attention for his short fiction (especially the Small Beer Press collection Skinny Dipping in the Lake of the Dead), and this longer story's energy ebbs a bit as Macy gets some of the oddness under control. Nonetheless, it's an impressive debut from a promising writer. (Dec.)

When compassion dies, we're all lessened as human beings: why we need gay marriage now more than ever.

Enough.

Enough.

Enough of your hate-based religious objections. Enough of your soap-boxes. Enough of your homophobic excuses. Enough of your deconstructionist nitpicking at country, state and federal laws. Enough of your obsession with making an entire class of people legally-lesser-beings.

Enough.

You want a HUMAN reason that we need a federal law recognizing same-sex marriage now? You want a reason that any compassionate God would agree with? READ THIS NOW. If you aren't completely furious by the end of this essay, you simply aren't human. And frankly, I don't want to know you.

And if you'd like to protest the way that Jackson Memorial Hospital treated these women and their family, here's the phone number for the hospital: (305) 585-1111.

Kirkus Reviews on Alan DeNiro's forthcoming TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS

Alan DeNiro's editor (who just stuffed me full of excellent Cuban food) passed along this great review of Alan's forthcoming debut novel TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS. (You will, of course, ignore Kirkus's obligatory snarky final half-sentence, because it just wouldn't be Kirkus Reviews if they didn't say one mean thing about every book.)

TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS
by Alan DeNiro (on sale November 24, 2009)

After Minnesota is overrun by ancient Scythians and a wasp-borne plague, 16-year-old Macy and her family embark on adventures of ever-escalating weirdness as they make their way down the Mississippi toward safety that no longer exists.

DeNiro (stories: Skinny-Dipping in the Lake of the Dead, 2006) opens his debut novel in semi-comic register, as the family struggles to adjust to a weird new order involving soldier-looters in Lakers jerseys, the shuttering of all non–fast-food businesses, SUV chassis towed by mules and a scar-faced guard at the family's riverside internment camp who sends Macy a looted necklace via her younger brother Ciaran. "I had a disfigured stalker with a sword," she wisecracks. "This made going stag to junior prom look like a joke." The mood grows steadily darker and grimmer. First Ciaran gets involved in intrigues among factions of the anachronistic warriors who have overrun the entire country and are battling for turf from coast to coast. The family manages to escape on a boat that limps south toward St. Louis, where Macy's father, an astronomer, keeps insisting that a university job awaits him. Along the way both Macy and her mother are stricken with the plague; Macy's sister runs off and is sold into indenture; they encounter elephants and giraffes, a wooden submarine and a talking dog. Eventually Ciaran is captured and sent south to Nueva Roma for trial and execution. Their father, now thriving in the former St. Louis as an astrologer, dispatches the recovered Macy to the grand delta capital to see if anything can be done to help her brother.

A fast-paced, suspenseful dystopian picaresque, part Huck Finn and part bizarro-world Swiss Family Robinson, with the latter winning out—to the benefit of those reading for plot and perhaps the disappointment of those looking for literary ambition.

The "Opus and Bill the Cat Thumb Their Noses at the FTC" Bloom County book giveaway contest!

The fine folks at Diamond Book Distributors have offered up for a giveaway a brand-new copy of the book that many of you comic fans have been salivating over: Bloom County: The Complete Collection, Volume One: 1980-1982, published by IDW, is the first of a five-volume collection that brings together all of Berkeley Breathed classic Bloom County strips in one ginormous and friggin' gorgeous collection. It just hit bookstore this week, too! (Seriously, I could not stop looking at this when I saw it at a friend's house in Seattle last week.)

---> Obligatory Ridiculous FTC Disclaimer <---

Did I get the book for free? Well, yes. However, technically the book resides in the state of Washington, from whence it will be mailed directly to the winner. Does it still count as my being compensated to promote the book if it never actually followed me home to New York? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

---> End Disclaimer <---

What do you need to do to win? WRITE ME AN FTC BOOK BLOG DISCLAIMER! Leave it in the comments field. The funniest one wins and will appear as my official FTC blog disclaimer in perpetuity or until the FTC comes to its collective senses.

Teh Rulez:

• One entry per person
• Leave your entry in the comments field of this post
• U.S. Residents only
• Contest closes at Friday, October 16th at 5:00 PM EST
• Winner will be announced on Monday, October 19th
• Employees of IDW, Diamond Comics and Diamond Books are not eligible
• Neither is Richard Cleland
• Or Roman Polanski
• Okay, I'm done now
• Well, maybe I'll exclude Michael Vicks, too
• Seriously, I am *really* done now
  

Okay, then. Get to it!

Client news: In case you missed it... A rave PW review for Kelly Gay's Better Part of Darkness!

Which means you're all going to go out right now and preorder this, right???

The Better Part of Darkness
Kelly Gay | Pocket | $7.99 (384p) ISBN 978-1-4391-0965-6

Gay debuts with this captivating urban fantasy. Thirteen years ago, mankind officially recognized the existence of paradisiacal Elysia and hellish Charbydon, and the multitude of mythical beings inhabiting them. Now Atlanta is a crossroads for all sorts of creatures, and the Integration Task Force keeps tabs on them all. Recently resurrected single mom Charlie Madigan juggles her personal life with her career as an ITF officer, searching for the source of a deadly narcotic called ash. When her family and friends are caught in the middle of her investigation, Charlie discovers powers she never knew, and a destiny that could destroy the entire world. How far will she go to save her child and her city? Intricate world-building and richly complex characters mix with a fast-paced plot to create a standout start to a new series. (Dec.)

Oh, and if y'all work at the FTC? FYI: I did get this book for free. It came to me as wee free digital bits via email. And yes, I'm wholly guilty of having pimped it to anyone who sat still long enough to listen.

Writers! Do you have Cart-Before-the-Horse-itis?

Don't have time for anything more than a link to another agent's wonderful post today. Holly Root, a great agent over at the Waxman Agency, has written a MUST-READ post for writers, especially those of you who've just sold your first book and now have grandiose (if unrealistic) ideas about being able to pump out four to six books a year between two or more publishers. This, my friend, is Cart-Before-the-Horse-itis, and a recipe for disaster. Don't let Cart-Before-the-Horse-itis strike you!

An interview with Artemis Fowl creator Eoin Colfer, author of the forthcoming And Another Thing

Here's a great video interview with Irish writer Eoin Colfer that we ("we" being myself and the fine folk at Hyperion Books) put together while we were all at San Diego Comic-Con in July. In this interview, Eoin talks about why he finally said yes to Douglas Adams' widow Jane Belsen when she asked him to write a new book in the Hitchhiker's Guide series. (You can also see the funky wallpaper of the hotel we all stayed at right behind Eoin's head!)

The four winners of the Backspace Agent-Author Seminar Scholarship Contest announced!

Without further ado (because Joanna and I are literally wiped out from reading and re-reading so many great queries and page samples!), the four winners of the 2009 Backspace Agent-Author Seminar Scholarship Contest are:

Susan Moger
Edgewater, MD
YA | 75k words | Title: Grace at War

Lisa Iriarte
Celebration, FL
Sci-Fi | 100k words | Title: Assassin's Nightmare

Lori Walker
Santa Barbara, CA
YA | 69k words | Title: Sugar Beet Hearts

Nikki Loftin
Austin, TX
Middle Grade | 34k words | Title: Escape From Comportment Camp

The four of you will be receiving a scholarship to attend the 2009 Backspace Agent-Author Seminar, taking place on November 5th & 6th at the Radisson-Martinique Hotel in New York City.** Someone from Backspace will be in touch with you shortly to discuss the details.

Joanna and I both look forward to meeting all of you in person in November!

**The scholarship does not cover transportation cost to NYC or hotel stay. If you are unable to use your scholarship, please let me know as soon as possible.

Congratulations to all our winners, and a heartfelt thank you to everyone who had the courage to enter the contest!

I love selling books by debut authors!

Some very good news for the week:

Scott Tracey's WITCH EYES, pitched as Smallville meets a gay Romeo and Juliet, in which a deadly supernatural feud between two powerful witch dynasties becomes dangerously complicated when the eldest sons of the two rival families unexpectedly fall in love, to Brian Farrey at Flux, in a two-book deal, by Colleen Lindsay at FinePrint Literary Management (World English).

Go congratulate Scott, why doncha?

(And yeah, this one really does just scream "Fanfic me, please!!!")

And you can read an interview with Scott here.

The world's worst pickup artist.

A friend forwarded this to me and I've been laughing like an idiot for ten minutes now. Guys? This is NOT how to approach a woman for a date. (Trust me on this.)

Guest blog: Agent Marlene Stringer talks about author self-promotion.

My colleague agent Marlene Stringer is the founder and managing agent of The Stringer Literary Agency LLC, and loves to see the creative ideas her clients come up with to promote their books. You can follow her Twitter feed here.

What’s the Deal with Book Promotion?

Every so often I’m asked my opinion of book promotion by authors, and a lot of the same ground is covered. Some are intrigued by the idea, and can’t wait to get out there. Others are the exact opposite, and have no desire to participate.

One writer on Twitter recently complained promotion isn’t his job. His job is to write wonderful novels, not go out and shill. He prefers to write, hand his manuscript over to an agent, and his work on that particular book is done. The rest all happens as if by magic – you know, those busy elves at night?

What a life!

If only.

As an agent I see hundreds of queries a month, and a minute percentage of those go on to make it all the way through the gauntlet of the publication process. With the odds of a chance at publishing so small, why wouldn’t a writer who has the opportunity do everything possible in order to assure his book’s success?

I have helped authors put together marketing plans, and coordinate with outside or publishing house publicists. Every author, book and promotion plan is different, and must be comfortable for the particular author in order to succeed. Every author can do something to help a book’s success.

What is promotion about? Promotion is the vehicle(s) you choose to help your book stand out from all the others published in a given month. When readers don’t know a book exists, they can’t buy it! If you choose to see promotion as an evil to be avoided at all costs, so be it. If you see it as a fun opportunity to meet potential readers and booksellers who will help sell your book, that’s great. It can be a positive and enjoyable experience if authors pick what’s right for them. However you see promotion, it is part of the contemporary publishing landscape, and it is here to stay until something better comes along.

There are all sorts of possibilities for book promotion, and if you’ve been around the publishing block for any length of time, you’ve seen them. Websites, book tours, blogs, social networking, television and radio interviews, contests, conventions, postcards, trailers, costumes, you name it, there’s something for every personality type, taste, and budget, and a new idea every day. If you’re not the type to dress up and attend a 19th century gala, you can attend a writers’ conference and sit on a panel. You can choose to do book signings, or speak at local libraries or schools. If you can afford it, you can hire a private publicist to help get the word out. If not, your house publicist is a tremendous resource, and can help you maximize the options you choose.

Publishing doesn’t happen in isolation. It is a group venture. Besides you and your book, your partners include your agent, your editor, your publicist, the sales force, etc. Everyone must do his share of the work to help make a book a success, and promotion is part of that work. However, as the author, this book has your name on it. If it is your goal to be a professional author, defined as one who earns a living from writing, then you’d better help sell the book. Every time a publisher takes on an author, they take a chance. Not just with the advance paid, but by using a slot that might be filled by any number of publication-worthy books. This is the opportunity you’ve waited for, and by assisting in the promotion process, you demonstrate your goal to succeed to the publisher. If your book doesn’t earn out, it will be difficult to prove to the publisher (or any publisher) why you deserve another shot if you haven’t helped sell the last book!

Promotion is not only about the book, it is about the author. It is about branding. Look at the most successful authors on bestseller lists. Some are publishing phenomena, true. Others, however, have built very successful careers over time by writing good books, reaching out to their readers, and employing successful promotion techniques. If you get the chance to be one of them, instead of rejecting it out of hand, decide how you can tailor your strengths into building a promotion plan that works for you.

I can't stop laughing at this...

Dating Montage
by smithy00101

Why you need to put your contact info on your manuscript. (Aside from the obvious DUH factor!)

Intern A read a query for us. Said query was received via snail mail. Intern A liked query and, upon asking one of the agents here at FinePrint for guidance, asked to see more. Intern A received partial. Liked partial. Asked to see full manuscript. Full manuscript did not arrive in a time manner (yet another strike against sending paper queries). Intern A's internship is up, She leaves, and moves onto job elsewhere. Intern B has replaced Intern A. Some weeks go by. Seasons pass. Colleen's hair begins to turn grey. THEN SUDDENLY!!!!! Previously requested manuscript shows up. Addressed to nobody in particular. But Intern B figures out that this is requested material, and takes it to Agent Z, who asks Intern B to read it and make notes. Intern B really likes manuscript; writes up a great deal of feedback, returns manuscript to Agent Z. Agent Z looks over manuscript and feedback, thinks Intern B is dead-on and sits down at her desk to email/phone author of mysterious manuscript...and discovers that there is no contact information on any part of the manuscript. Not a phone number. Not an email. Not a PO Box or street address. Just the author's name, which is of no help at all.

So, in the future, dear authors. take heed: Put your contact info on the front page. Then, for the love of all that is holy, put your contact info in the header or footer OF EVERY SINGLE PAGE OF YOUR MANUSCRIPT! Because pages get separated. Interns leave. Email sometimes gets deleted. Agents have brain farts. (Hey, it happens.) Prepare yourself for every eventuality by putting your name, phone and email on every single page of your manuscript.

Okay, then.

Now, if anyone out there in the blogosphere knows someone named Christy Humphrey who writes YA fantasy, would you please have him (or her) email Suzie at FinePrint? Thank you.

Some great news!!! (And why we love Backspace!)

Due to the enormous volume of great entries in the Backspace Agent-Author Seminar Scholarship Contest, the awesome people at Backspace: The Writer's Place contacted me this morning to let me know that they have decided to very graciously donate TWO ADDITIONAL SCHOLARSHIPS for the contest! That means we'll be announcing four scholarship winners next week instead of two!

Woooooooooohoooooooooo!!!

People are talking about Alan DeNiro's forthcoming book TOTAL OBLIVION, MORE OR LESS

More specifically, writerly-type people are talking about my client Alan DeNiro's forthcoming debut novel Total Oblivion, More or Less.

I'm thrilled to share with you three outstanding quotes for Alan's book:

“A wonderfully weird, fun, touching, heartfelt and memorable novel. Imagine if Huck Finn had been living in post-apocalypse America, and Terry Pratchett had been promoted to God, with George Saunders as his avenging angel. Alan DeNiro has created a hilarious and terrifying dream world, but his real genius is that he's peopled it with characters we come to love."
– Dan Chaon, author of Among the Missing and Await Your Reply

“In Total Oblivion, More or Less, Alan DeNiro lifts the modern family drama and sets it down in the middle of a wildly inventive post apocalyptic landscape. The insulated life of Middle America may be a thing of the past, but DeNiro finds a way to lead readers into a future full of humor, imagination, and hope.”
– Hannah Tinti, author of The Good Thief

"Total Oblivion, More or Less is filled with weird sightings and wild doings – chock-a-block with adventure, suspense, and surprise. Apocalyptic family values, too! Recommended to all."
– Karen Joy Fowler, author of The Jane Austen Book Club

Our president is a nerd. It's official.